Terrance and Phillip in Not Without My Anus
The show starts off with the build up from last season's cliffhanger revolving around Cartman's paternal origins. However, just as it seems they are about to get on with the second half of "Cartman's Mom Is A Dirty Slut," they do a 180-degree turnaround and reveal that for April Fool's Day they will be showing Terrance & Phillip in "Not Without My Anus."
Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut
Dr. Mephisto is about to reveal who Eric Cartman's father really is! Glass shatters and gunshots ring out. A mysterious assailant apparently shot Mephisto while the lights were off. Much to Eric's chagrin, they rush Mephisto off to the hospital. Chef rushes out the door with Mephisto in hand. They must fight against time to learn Eric's background, who is his father? Where does he come from?
Ike's Wee Wee
Ike's going to have a Briss and everyone is invited! Stan, Kenny and Cartman find out what a Briss really is and try to warn Kyle that his parents are going to cut off Ike's wee-wee. Kyle sends Ike away to protect him from his scissor wielding parents.
Chickenlover
The Booktastic bus is in town and soon everyone finds out that Officer Barbrady can't read. He is whisked off to school with the boys so he can save his job. While he's there someone in South Park is having sex with the town's chickens and only Officer Barbrady with his new deputies Kenny, Kyle, Stan and Cartman can stop them!
Conjoined Fetus Lady
Kyle is injured and must go to see the school nurse and is terrified because of the stories he's heard. She looks fairly normal, except for the dead fetus sticking out of her head. Kyle's mother educates the boys on her "condition" and decides that everyone should be made aware. Meanwhile, the South Park Cows dodgeball team goes to the state, national and finally the international finals in China.
The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka
Mr. Garrison assigns the boys to learn about Vietnam from somebody they know. Stan's Uncle Jimbo and his friend Ned tell the boys their outrageous tale. Mr. Garrison doesn't believe the boy's report and gives them detention. They plot revenge against Stan's Uncle by submitting a phony video of the Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka to them.
City on the Edge of Forever
While their school bus is dangling on the edge of a cliff, the boys remember some of their past adventures. Mrs. Crabtree catches a ride into town with a stranger and winds up doing a brief stint as a standup comedienne. Back in South Park, Mr. Mackey convinces the parents that their missing children must have run away. In the end it's all a dream within a dream.
Summer Sucks
Schools out for summer and with Mr. Hat missing, Mr.Garrison is over the edge. The state has a ban on the sale of fireworks and it screws up the boys' plans for a 4th of July celebration. Mr. Garrison seeks psychiatric help from Dr. Katz while Jimbo and Ned go to Mexico, in an attempt to smuggle fireworks back to the children of America.
Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls
A film festival moves to South Park, only to have a devastating effect on the sewer system. Mr. Hankey calls upon Kyle for help. The movie people interpret Kyle's pleading as a pitch and they quickly turn his story into a film starring Tom Hanks and a monkey they call "Mr. Hankey." Kyle is outraged that the filmmakers aren't hearing his pleas. Soon Chef's Salty Chocolate Balls energize everyone.
Chickenpox
Cartman's mother plots to give the boys the chickenpox by sending them over to Kenny's for a sleepover. Both Stan and Cartman breakout but Kyle remains immune. Kyle discovers "the parental conspiracy" and with the other boys hires a prostitute to give their parents herpes. Meanwhile, Kenny's mother and Kyle's mother reunite their husbands who were both childhood friends that drifted apart.
Roger Ebert Should Lay Off the Fatty Foods
The kids go on a field trip to the planetarium. All of the children except Cartman are acting wierd. As usual Stan and Kyle, with Kenny's sacrifice, try to get to bottom of the mystery. Meanwhile, Cartman wins an appearance on a snack commercial. The four boys get to the root of the strange planetarium.
Clubhouses
Stan needs to build a clubhouse so he and Kyle can play "Truth or Dare" with Wendy and her friend, who has a crush on Kyle. Cartman and Kenny retaliate by building a clubhouse of their own, only theirs has hot chicks. Meanwhile, the Marshes marriage breaks up and Stan learns a valuable lesson about love and family.
Cow Days
South Park's annual "Cow Days" party is happening! The cows become transfixed on a cow statue. In order to get the money they need to win Terrance and Phillip dolls, the boys sign Cartman up for a bull riding contest. A freak accident has Cartman believing he is a Vietnamese prostitute named Ming Li. The boys learn about money and cow insanity.
Chef Aid
Chef is getting sued by Capitalist Records for trying to obtain the rights to a song he wrote twenty years ago. He needs 2-million dollars to hire Johnny Cochran. In response the boys round up all of Chef's old musician friends and organize a huge concert to raise the cash.
Spookyfish
Sharon Marsh's Aunt Flo makes her monthly visit and she has a present for Stan, a fish. Stan's fish really freaks him out, especially when the dead bodies start piling up. Mrs. Marsh is convinced Stan is doing the killings and begins hiding the bodies. The boys discover there are two Cartman's and a gateway to a parallel universe at the "Indian Burial Ground Pet Store."
Merry Christmas Charlie Manson!
Kyle, Stan and Kenny accompany Eric and his family to a Christmas celebration with the Cartman family. One of Cartman's relatives breaks out of jail for the reunion with his cellmate, Charles Manson.
Gnomes
Harbucks coffee plans to move into South Park and drive Tweek coffee shop out of business. Mr. Garrison assigns a report on current events to help him keep his job. The boys are planning on doing their report on the underpants gnomes. Tweek's father schemes to use the boy's report as a platform for fighting Harbucks. The report the boys deliver sparks the town into taking action.
Prehistoric Ice Man
Kyle falls into a cave. Stan goes to rescue him and finds an iceman and the two fight each other for sole credit. Dr. Mephisto discovers that the iceman has been frozen since 1996. The iceman is put on display and the fighting Kyle and Stan free him. The iceman tries to return to his family. Meanwhile, the government has their own plans to use the iceman in their plot against Sweden.
Rainforest Shmainforest
Mr. Mackey punishes the boys by forcing them to join the "Getting Gay With Kids" choir. The choir is going to Costa Rica to help save the rainforest. While on a tour of the rainforest, the choir group gets lost when a snake kills their guide. They soon discover the evils of the rainforest, which changes the choir group's message.
Spontaneous Combustion
Kenny spontaneously combusts. The mayor asks Randy Marsh to find a solution. The boys try to help Kyle's dad to get an erection. One way they think they can help is by performing the Stations of the Cross at church, crucifying Cartman and waiting three days for his res-erection. Randy Marsh figures out that the reason everyone is combusting is because they are withholding their farts.
Succubus
Kyle and Stan try to rescue Chef from the clutches of the Succubus that he is going to marry. Meanwhile, Cartman deals with his eye problems and the optometrist he doesn't like. Chef's Mama and Papa appear for the first time.
Jakovasaurs
The boys discover a live, prehistoric Jakovasaur while camping on Stark's Pond. The government and the citizens of South Park are interested in trying to help keep this endangered species alive, until they all realize how annoying the Jakovasaurs really are. The only one who really enjoys them is Cartman. The boys try distracting him while the town tries to send the Jakovasaurs to France.
Tweek vs. Craig
The boys take Shop class and try to set up a fight between Tweek and Craig. Kenny is delighted in safely taking the Home Economics course. When the big fight arrives, the combatants don't know what to do, so Jimbo and Ned teach Tweek boxing, and Cartman has Craig instructed in the art of Sumo. Shop teacher Mr. Adler has a recurring dream about a woman that he was never able to say goodbye to.
Sexual Harassment Panda
Sexual Harassment Panda visits Mr. Garrison's class. Cartman sues Stan for sexual harassment, and Kyle's dad is getting rich. The boys go in search of Sexual Harassment Panda to stop the insanity. They find him at The Island of Misfit Mascots Commune and convince him to change his cause. He becomes Petey, the "don't sue people" Panda.
Cat Orgy
Shelly Marsh is babysitting Cartman. Shelly invites her boyfriend over, and he in turn invites his band. Cartman has to prove that Shelly has violated the rules. Meanwhile, Cartman's cat is in heat, searches for a good time and invites all the cats in the neighborhood back to the empty Cartman house for an orgy.
Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub
Stan's parents bring him to Mr. Mackey's party, but he gets sent down to the basement to be with the lame kids. Kyle and Stan's fathers experiment with their homosexual tendencies. The ATF is convinced that the meteor shower party is actually a gathering of a religious cult that is going to commit suicide when the meteor shower arrives. Stan tries to save himself and the party from the ATF.
Jewbilee
Kyle invites Kenny to join him at Jewbilee, a Boy Scout-like gathering for Jewish kids. His parents are going to attend Mr. Mackey's party. At camp, Ike is sent to join the little group called "Squirts." Kyle and Kenny join the scouts, where they concentrate on soap sculptures. This art is key to the Jewish elders celebration of Moses.
Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery
Korn comes to South Park for a Halloween gig and learns of the boys' problems with the fifth graders at South Park Elementary. Korn agrees to help the boys get revenge on the mean fifth graders, all in a spooky Scooby-Doo rip off!
Chinpokomon
The kids of South Park discover Chinpokomon, Japan's number one cool toy to own! Wanting to avoid being losers, they persuade their parents to buy them the toys, only to discover that the Chinpokomon are designed to brainwash them into bombing Pearl Harbor. The parents band together to stop Japan and save America!
Hooked on Monkey Fonics
Mrs. Cartman is about to give Eric a present. Of course, Eric is hoping it will be some kind of toy, but it ends up being Hooked On Monkey Fonics to help him win the big South Park Annual Spelling Bee. Meanwhile, Kyle finds Rebecca Cutswald to be quite intriguing and tries to woo her with his charm and teach her how to love and learn in public school.
Starvin' Marvin in Space
Starvin' Marvin finds an alien ship and begins searching out a new home for his people. The government interrogates the boys to find out about Marvin and direct them to Sally Struthers. Marvin stops in South Park to pick up the boys and take them to the planet Marklar. The Marklarians are willing to let the Ethiopians relocate to their world. The Christian channel does all they can to stop them.
The Red Badge of Gayness
South Park's Civil War reenactment, sponsored by "Jagerminz S'More Flavored Schnapps," gets out of hand. Cartman persuades the drunken lot to defeat the northerners so that he can win a bet with Kyle and Stan that will make them his slaves for one month.
Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics
Mr. Hankey introduces 10 musical segments highlighting songs on the CD, "Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics." The boys and all of the other South Park characters sing their own songs for the holidays and realize that Christmas is all about the presents.
Are You There God? It's Me, Jesus
Cartman is convinced he is going through puberty since he started bleeding out of his ass. Dr. Mephisto gives Stan some hormones. He gets facial hair, boobs and his voice starts changing. People are waiting outside of Jesus' home to see what kind of miracle he offers, which ends up involving a comeback performance of a very old Rod Stewart and, eventually, an appearance by God.
World Wide Recorder Concert
The children of South Park are practicing "My Country 'Tis of Thee" for the "4 Million Child Blow," sponsored by Yoko Ono. At the concert, Stan and Kyle try to figure out a way to "out cool" the kids from New York. Cartman tries to find "the brown noise" and is successful. Stan and Kyle plan against the kids from New York, but their scheme goes much too far.
Tooth Fairy's Tats 2000
The tooth fairy has visited Cartman, leaving him $2. He rushes to the bus stop to share his news with the others. He then unveils his latest plan. If they all combined their lost teeth, the tooth fairy would provide them with enough cash to purchase a Sega Dreamcast. They soon find out that they are treading on someone else's territory. Now they have to work with the mobsters to keep their manhood.
Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000
The kids have just won a sledding race. Token says that the only reason they won is because of Eric's fat ass. The girls challenge the boys to a sledding race down Phil Collins Hill. Token says that the boys can't lose thanks to Eric's fat ass. Eric then tosses a rock into the side of Token's head. The people of South Park claim that this was a hate crime and send him to jail.
Timmy 2000
There's something wrong with new student Timmy. About the only thing Timmy can do is say his name. Ignorant of the fact that Timmy is "retarded," they believe he has ADD, which relieves him of the responsibility to do any homework. Soon the rest of the class manages to get diagnosed with ADD, and all get prescribed Ritalin.
Quintuplets 2000
The boys discover 8-year-old contorting quintuplets from Romania. Cartman decides to stage his own performance. The quintuplets and their grandmother defect from Romania and wind up staying at the Marsh's home. Thanks to Grandpa Marsh, the girls' grandmother gets "loved to death." The girl's father is brought in by the Romanian government to demand his daughters back. Janet Reno to the rescue!
Cartman Joins NAMBLA
Cartman decides to seek the friendship of older men. Using the Internet, he makes a connection with men who love to hang out with little boys. An organization called NAMBLA (North American Man-Boy Love Association) holds a meeting in South Park, and Cartman becomes their poster child. The boys learn how much an adult can really love a child.
Cherokee Hair Tampons
Kyle needs a kidney transplant, and Cartman is a perfect donor. Cartman has a $10 million price for his kidney. The other boys go to Cartman's house with the plan to take one of his kidneys. Cartman thwarts their plan. Stan, depressed about the inevitable loss of his friend, decides to take action into his own hands and, with the help of the parents, gets Cartman's kidney for Kyle.
Chef Goes Nanners
Chef is declaring that South Park's flag is racist. Stan and Kyle head up the team championing the current flag, while Wendy and Cartman head up the side for a new flag. Wendy ends up confessing to Bebe of her attraction to Cartman. The debate starts, but before Wendy can make her point, she kisses Cartman to regain her composure.
Something You Can Do With Your Finger
"Fingerbang" is the latest boy band starring the four boys. Randy Marsh is against Stan's participation in any boy band. The boys land a gig at the local mall when it is threatened because there are only 4 members in the band. Stan arrives and the group is set to perform when suddenly the mall elevator tragically crushes Kenny. A former boy band member steps into the spotlight to save the gig.
Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?
The boys attend church, and the priest puts the fear of hell in them. They must go to Sunday school and learn that they must confess their sins. The boys are worried about Timmy -- after all, he can only say his name. Feeling the need to confess their sins, they catch the priest in a compromising position and decide to save themselves.
Probably
Cartman preaches, and the children begin plans to build a church. Satan spends the night with Saddam. Kenny wasn't killed in the previous episode, but the bus that ran him over stops in Mexico, where Kenny is found. Satan, in his time of crisis, turns to God for advice. Cartman is discovered as a fraud and is sent to Mexico for punishment.
Fourth Grade
The kids have to face the 4th grade, and they're not too happy about it. Cartman cooks up a scheme to go back in time to return to the 3rd grade, where things were fun and easy. Two geeks help them rig Timmy's wheelchair into a working time machine and send Timmy on the trip of his life!
Trapper Keeper
Cartman has a new Trapper Keeper (that blows Kyle's out of the water). After he's done bragging, a stranger tells him that it will soon take over the world if they don't destroy it now. Cool "2001: A Space Odyssey" and "Akira" parodies!
Helen Keller! The Musical
The boys are doing their version of the Helen Keller story and plan to beat the kindergartners' show. Timmy stars as Helen Keller and gets a new friend to play with! Fireworks, fountains and outstanding musicals galore!
Pip
This is the story of Pip's origin. Pip gets a job at the Havesham Estate where he meets Estella. She only spurns his optimism with insults. When Pip is offered the opportunity to become a gentleman, he goes to London -- only to discover that Miss Havesham plans to break his heart. Her plan is to use Pip's tears to power her Genesis device, which will allow her to gain revenge on all men.
Fat Camp
Mrs. Cartman holds an intervention for her son's eating problem and is sending him to fat camp. Cartman returns from camp 40 pounds lighter. Cartman is selling candy to the fat kids. Kenny is challenged by the other children to do crazy things for money. Kenny's popularity rises, and he soon gets his own TV show. An event happens where Kenny gets inside Ms. Crabtree's uterus for six hours.
The Wacky Molestation Adventure
The "Raging Pussies" concert is on! Kyle calls the police and says his parents have been "molestering" him. Soon all the children are calling in on all the adults in South Park, until only children live in South Park. The locked-up adults of South Park get therapy to prevent them from sexually abusing their children.
A Very Crappy Christmas
Kyle and Ike anxiously await Mr. Hankey. When he doesn't show, Kyle calls the others for a late night emergency meeting. They find Mr. Hankey living with his alcoholic wife and their three little nuggets. He tells them that no one is into Christmas. They all decide to try and spread some Christmas cheer. Featuring Jesus and Santa Claus as themselves.
It Hits the Fan
The you-know-what hits the fan a 162 times when the citizens of South Park hear the word "Sh*t" on the popular show, "Cop Drama." Boffo ratings have the executives at HBC plotting further use of the curse word, as the nation is struck by a mysterious plague that unleashes the ancient Knights of Standards and Practices. Only Chef and the boys can save South Park and the world!
Cripple Fight!
Big Gay Al returns to South Park only to be thrown out as Scoutmaster to the boys for being gay. The boys rally to his defense, with the help of the new "handi-capable" kid, Jimmy. But there's only room for one crippled kid in South Park, so Timmy and Jimmy throw off the gloves, as well as the crutches and wheelchair, in an all out slugfest to end all slugfests.
Scott Tenorman Must Die
Cartman goes medieval on Scott Tenorman's ass when ginger-haired Scott tricks our supple hero into buying his pubic hair for $16.12. Radiohead guest stars and plays a role in Cartman's elaborate scheme at getting sweet revenge on his unsuspecting foe.
Terrance and Phillip: Behind the Blow
In the grand tradition of Wham UK, flatulant Canadian superstars, Terrance and Phillip, have broken up over creative differences. The clock is ticking as the boys struggle to reunite the fartastic duo and recruit them in time for South Park's Earth Day festivities.
Cartmanland
Cartman inherits one-million dollars from his grandmother, fulfilling his lifelong dream of owning his own amusement park, Cartmanland! A hemorrhoid erupts in Kyle's ass when he learns of Cartman's undeserved fortune, making him question the very existence of God and whether there's a reason to stay alive in a world where someone like Cartman is happy.
Proper Condom Use
Thanks to Stan's "handy" work, the children of South Park must endure sex education from the unlikely duo of Mr. Mackey and Ms. Choksondik. While the two adults take their lessons to heart, the children are left frightened, mis-informed and armed for battle against the opposite sex. Much hilarity ensues.
Towelie
The boys get a new video game system and their plan for the next 38 hours is to play it! Until they discover Towelie, a government secret, genetically engineered towel that gets his special powers from gettin' high. When the government steals Stan's new Game Sphere the boys will stop at nothing to get it back. Losing precious gaming time they find Towelie and begin the struggle of the century.
Osama Bin Laden Has Farty Pants
Who needs Special Ops when you have Cartman's fat ass on your side? After accidentally being sent to Afghanistan, Cartman (in a tribute to WWII-era Loony Toons) and the boys take on Osama and the Taliban learning that they have a lot more in common with the Afghani children than they ever realized. Go America! Go Broncos!
How to Eat with Your Butt
Cartman has finally gone too far when a prank involving Kenny's sweet cheeks results in him blowing a "funny fuse." After a photo of Kenny's better side finds it's way onto the side of a milk carton, an unusual couple arrives in South Park to claim their missing child. Much ass kissing ensues.
The Entity
Frustrated with long lines at the airport, Mr. Garrison (Herbert to his friends) invents a new mode of transportation that's "extra enjoyable" for roughly 10 percent of the population. And Kyle's cousin Kyle visits South Park, bringing his "New York sensibilities" with him -- much to our Kyle's horror.
Here Comes The Neighborhood
Feeling like an outcast for being the only rich kid in town, Token succeeds in attracting several other wealthy people to South Park. Meanwhile, the townspeople, fearing that their little hamlet is rapidly going up the drain, attempt to run the new residents out of town by any means necessary.
Kenny Dies
In a very special episode of South Park, Cartman fights for Kenny's life when he speaks before Congress in favor of stem cell research. Meanwhile, Stan has trouble dealing with his f-f-friend's impending demise.
Butters' Very Own Episode
Butters is back with his very own episode! And he inadvertently reveals a dark family secret about his fathers' late night "shopping" sprees. Alone and lost Butters determinedly makes his way through porn theatres and gay bathhouses in an effort get back home in time to celebrate his parents' anniversary. A suicidal mom, a perverted dad and Butters caught right in the middle of all the wackiness!
Jared Has Aides
As the country becomes obsessed with a popular program for losing weight, the boys see their opportunity to become sponsored by a major restaurant chain. In Butter's regimen to drop some pounds his parents ground him for getting lyposuction surgery. The plot thickens when the rival weight-loss spokesman finally "comes out" with the secret weapon he used in the fight against fat.
Asspen
With their parents stuck in Time Share Hell, our boys are on their own on the slopes of Aspen, circa 1985. Stan gets challenged to a ski race and must win in order to save the youth center, get the girl and free the trapped spirits of the Wakacha Vampire Indians. Not that he really cares.
Freak Strike
The kids learn that Talk Shows offer special assistance to grossly disfigured people. They immediately sign Butters up as a guest with a strange deformity. With the help of some strategic physical enhancement, Butters is sure to beat out all the other freaks and win a prize. However, when there isn't enough of Butters' prize to go around Cartman makes a bid for his own guest spot with Maury.
Fun With Veal
When the boys learn where veal comes from on a field trip to the local slaughterhouse, they instantly turn into junior eco-terrorists (call Tom Ridge!). After calf-napping all the future parmigiana meat in town, the boys blockade themselves in Stan's bedroom, where Stan develops a "genital" disease from his diet of fruits and vegetables. Maybe tortured baby cow meat really does a body good.
The New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer
The boys will stop at nothing to watch the new Terrance and Phillip movie trailer. Even if it means sitting through thirty minutes of "Russell Crowe: Fightin' 'Round the World." Hey, at least it's not "That 80's Show."
Professor Chaos
Cartman, Kyle and Stan have been thinking long and hard about Butters' job as the replacement friend since Kenny kicked the bucket. Unfortunately they feel that his attempts just plain suck so they decide to fire him! Butters' rejection causes him to uncover a deep dark part of him that he never knew existed, and plots to end the world with his new found mental illness as "Professor Chaos!"
The Simpsons Already Did It
Professor Chaos (okay, it's just Butters) returns with brand new, super evil, schemes to wreak havoc on South Park. Unfortunately, the Simpsons have already done them all. Meanwhile, a super secret ingredient helps Cartman's "Sea People" evolve at an alarming rate. Stan, Kyle, and new friend Tweek, costar. Kenny is still dead.
Red Hot Catholic Love
"Dangerous Lives of Altar Boys" you say? Not on Priest Maxi's watch. Even if it means traveling to the Vatican and enduring the real-life challenges of a 4K video game, circa 1982. Oh, and Cartman craps out of his mouth.
Free Hat
The boys campaign to save movies from directors hellbent on "improving them." Unfortunately, the townspeople are consumed with their own campaign to free a convicted baby killer (don't ask). In true Hollywood fashion, the hero you least expected, Tweek, emerges; and in true South Park fashion, he fails miserably. Luckily, everything works out in the end ... sort of.
Bebe's Boobs Destroy Society
Bebe is the first girl in the fourth grade to "develop." Her new little breasts inspire a primate-like reaction from all the boys in class that threaten their friendship and society in general.
Child Abduction is Not Funny
In an effort to protect their children from kidnappers, the parents of South Park hire the owner and operator of the local City Wok to build a Great Wall around the city. When crazy things like Kid trackers and Mongolions come into the picture. The parents learn a very important lesson themselves about trusting strangers.
A Ladder to Heaven
The boys have to find a way to reach Kenny before they lose their chance at untold candy riches; and what better way to achieve this than a ladder to heaven -- because Kenny's dead. Said ladder quickly becomes a national sensation, leading to lame (redundant, I know) country songs and the usual government intervention. Will the boys succeed? In a word or two: sort of.
The Return of the Fellowship of the Ring to the Two Towers
The boys are on a mission: return "The Lord of the Rings" to the Two Towers Video Store in Conifer. But this is no ordinary copy. Butters, the evil sixth graders and the boys' parents all try to steal the ring, er tape, from the boys. Will they succeed? What do you think? J.R.R. Tolkien must be spinning in his grave.
The Death Camp of Tolerance
A loveable new character, Mr Slave, makes his debut as Mr. Garrison desperately tries to get fired from his new job as the boys' 4th grade teacher. Meanwhile, our little heroes get sent to the Deathcamp of Intolerance for not tolerating Mr. Garrison's intolerable behavior (e.g. sticking a gerbil up Mr. Slave's ass). Lemmiwinks (the afore-mentioned gerbil) guest-stars.
The Biggest Douche in the Universe
When a famous psychic fails to help him exorcise Kenny from his body, Cartman takes other steps to achieve his goal. He and Chef travel to the moors of Scotland, where Chef's mom tries a little of her voodoo magic on him. Meanwhile, after the boys encounter with the TV psychic, Kyle is paralyzed with fear at the thought of members of the spirit world watching over him.
My Future Self n' Me
When a 32-year-old man claiming to be Stan from the future shows up in South Park, young Stan is forced to come to terms with the loser he will become. Meanwhile, South Park's own little entrepreneur, Eric Cartman is at the helm of a new money making venture. Cartman is in the business of revenge.
Red Sleigh Down
Once again, it's Christmas time in South Park. When all the tallies are in, Cartman is over drawn in the "naughty" column. He has to score one big "nice" to be eligible for Christmas presents this year. With the help of Santa, Mr. Hankey and Jesus, Cartman attempts to bring Christmas to the downtrodden citizens of Iraq.
Cancelled
Everyone’s favorite delinquent minors are back when Stan, Cartman, Kyle and Kenny find out that Earth is just one big intergalactic reality show that’s about to be canceled. When the satellite dish in Cartman’s ass reactivates, the four boys travel to meet the Joosyans (the heads of all the media in the galaxy) to try and convince them not to cancel their show.
Krazy Kripples
When Christopher Reeve comes to town, Jimmy becomes offended because everyone pays attention to him. Timmy and Jimmy decide to start a gang called the "Crips" allowing only people who are crippled from birth to join (making them the only members). When they decide to take on more "crips," Jimmy and Timmy hang with the five points Crips and pop some Bloods.
Toilet Paper
When the boys get held after school by their art teacher for not appreciating art, Cartman convinces them that the only way to get back at her is to...TP her house. After the vengeance has been carried out, Kyle's dreams are haunted with the screams and cries of the teacher’s children who were in the house at the time.
I'm a Little Bit Country
In order to get out of school, the boys enter an anti-war demonstration. Not really knowing what they're protesting for, Mr. Garrison decides to teach the boys a lesson by making them write an essay about our founding fathers. Cartman, being the lazy asshole that he is, says that studying is way too much for a nine-year-old to handle and decides to cook up a crazy scheme in order to get out of it.
Fat Butt and Pancake Head
One of Cartman's body parts becomes too famous for its own good. The real Jenny From the Block is enraged to learn that a new "Diva" has stolen her record deal and her boyfriend! South Park will never be the same after Jenny & Ben meet the new "Ms. Lopez."
Lil' Crime Stoppers
When Stan and Kyle feel that their play time no longer has any meaning, they decide to become pretend Police Detectives in order to make a difference. When an assignment goes wrong Cartman, Kyle, Stan and Kenny learn the true meaning of being a pretend cop, and the duties behind it.
Red Man's Greed
The owners of the Three Feathers Indian Casino have acquired the town of South Park. The citizens are being forced off their land to make way for a new super highway. Faced with saying goodbye to their friends and their way of life, the boys rally the townspeople to fight back against the rich and powerful Indians.
South Park Is Gay
Launching the second half of the seventh series, episode 708 entitled "South Park is gay!" has the whole town joining the hip new homosexual craze. Suddenly, it's cool to be gay! Cartman, Stan, Kyle and Kenny go head to head with the other kids to see who can be the "gayest," while Mr. Garrison vows to stop the Queer Eye Guys.
Christian Rock Hard
Cartman, Butters and Token rocket to the top of the Christian rock charts with their own messages of faith, entitled "Christian Rock Hard." When the other boys kick Cartman out of their band, Cartman pulls his own group together to make music for Jesus. Meanwhile, Stan, Kyle and Kenny are arrested for downloading music from the Internet.
Grey Dawn
After South Park's senior citizens have mowed down more than a few farmers' markets, the residents no longer feel it's safe to be out in the streets. With their well being at stake, the boys decide to take action against the older generation. Unwilling to surrender their driver's licenses, the elderly fight back.
Casa Bonita
Kyle's parents are taking him and three of his friends to Casa Bonita, Colorado's version of a Mexican Disneyland. When Kyle chooses to invite Butters over him, Cartman arranges to have poor Butters go conveniently "missing."
All About Mormons
A Mormon kid moves to South Park and Stan has to kick his ass. But when Stan and his dad meet their new Mormon neighbors, they become fascinated with how genuinely nice they are. Meanwhile the other boys mock Stan relentlessly for wimping out.
Butt Out
After Representatives from the anti-smoking campaign do their song and dance for the children of South Park Elementary, the boys take up the nasty habit.
Raisins
Wendy breaks up with Stan because he never spends any time with her. To cheer him up, the boys take him to "Raisins," a local restaurant known for its cheap food and hot girls. Later, as Stan tries desperately to win Wendy back, Butters believes he’s found the girl of his dreams.
It's Christmas in Canada
The Brovlofski family is dealt a devastating blow when Ike's Canadian birth parents show up unexpectedly and want their baby back. When the townspeople decide to forego Christmas gifts and take up a collection to get Ike home to South Park, the boys are distraught. Before all the money for their Christmas presents gets spent, they hightail it to Canada to bring Ike home themselves.
Good Times With Weapons
South Park takes on the look of Japanese Anime. The boys are transformed into Japanese Warriors after they buy martial arts weapons at a local flea market. Their sworn enemy, Professor Chaos, confronts them and a highly stylized battle ensues.
Up the Down Steroid
Jimmy is in training for an upcoming sporting event and he's determined to win at any cost. Cartman feels he can easily take first place against Jimmy. He just has to convince the qualifying committee he's handicapped.
The Passion of the Jew
Kyle finally sees "The Passion" and is forced to admit Cartman has been right all along. Meanwhile many of the film's hardcore fans band together under Cartman's leadership to carry out it's message.
You Got F'd in the A
It's up to Stan to put a team of South Park's best dancers together to compete against a rival troupe from Orange County. While Butters has won awards for his dancing, he refuses to help Stan out, as he hasn't been able to dance since the tragic death of eight audience members at his last competition.
AWESOM-O
Cartman dresses up like a robot, calls himself AWESOM-O, and moves in with Butters. His plan is to learn all of Butter's innermost secrets and then use them against him. While Butters is thrilled to have found a new best friend, the Army believes AWESOM-O is some new secret weapon, and Hollywood is after the phony robot to develop their next big blockbuster.
The Jeffersons
All the children of South Park are attracted to "Mr. Jefferson," his son and their home filled with games, toys and animals. Cartman goes out of his way to get "Mr. Jefferson" to love him while the local police force resent him for being black and wealthy and decide to bring him down.
Goobacks
Humans from the year 4035 are arriving in droves in South Park! Everything gets a little too crowded when people from the future arrive through a recently discovered time portal. When the boys try to earn some extra money, the time immigrants, who are willing to do the same work for next to nothing, take their jobs.
Douche and Turd
When PETA demonstrates against the use of a cow as South Park Elementary’s mascot, the student body is forced to choose a new one. As the election approaches, Kyle tries to convince everyone that his candidate, a giant douche, is better than Cartman’s nominee, a turd sandwich.
Something Wall-Mart This Way Comes
The streets of South Park are like a ghost-town when a giant Wall-Mart lures all the townspeople to the new store with its incredible bargains. Cartman becomes a boy possessed by the power of Wall-Mart and its low, low prices. In order to save their town, Stan and Kyle have to find a way to destroy the ever-expanding superstore while keeping Cartman from stabbing them in the back.
Preschool
For five long years, Stan, Kyle, Kenny, Cartman and Butters have kept a secret about an illegal incident that happened back in preschool. Now, the kid who took the fall for the group, Trent Boyett, is getting out of "juvie" and his first order of business is revenge.
Quest for Ratings
The boys of South Park produce their own morning news show on the school’s closed-circuit television station and are immediately caught up in the intense competition for ratings.
Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset
All the fourth grade girls idolize a rich, famous and spoiled socialite. They even have her brand new toy set that comes complete with video camera, night vision filter, play money and losable cell phone. In an effort to impress their idol, the girls pursue the boys to make their own videos.
Cartman's Incredible Gift
After sustaining a severe head injury, Cartman appears to have the power to see into the future. South Park detectives are quick to enlist his help in cracking unsolved murder cases and Cartman is more than willing to help, for a price. In the meantime, a group of "licensed" psychics cry foul when Cartman refuses to join their ranks.
Woodland Critter Christmas
Stan is approached by the forest critters and asked to help them build a manger in anticipation of the birth of their Lord and Savior. Stan complies, only to find out that they serve a... very different Lord.
Mr. Garrison's Fancy New Vagina
Mr. Garrison goes to great lengths to get what he's always wanted: a sex change. As he enjoys his new womanly attributes, the rest of the town gets in touch with their inner feelings too. Meanwhile, Kyle wrestles with the fact that Jews just aren't good at basketball.
Die Hippie, Die
When hippie drum circles start popping up in people's attics and backyards, the citizens of South Park have no choice but to turn to Eric Cartman for help. In the onslaught of Hippie Jam Fest 2005, Cartman faces one of his greatest challenges yet: to rid the world of Hippies once and for all.
Wing
As talent agents, Cartman, Stan, Kyle and Kenny can bank 10% of their client's earnings. After they pool all their resources to impress their one and only client, another agency steals him away. Desperate to earn their money back, they take on another client with plans to launch her on a new reality show.
Best Friends Forever
Kenny is the only one of his friends to get the newest, coolest, portable gaming device and Cartman can't deal with the injustice of it all. When Kenny meets with an unfortunate accident and is only being kept alive through the use of a feeding tube, Cartman lobbies to let Kenny die so he can get his hands on the new toy.
The Losing Edge
The kids desperately want an end to the boring baseball season. The problem is, they keep winning. After making it to the state baseball championships, the boys of South Park decide to save the rest of their summer by throwing the game. They soon find out the opposing team is much better at losing than they are.
The Death of Eric Cartman
Butters is freaked out when he thinks he can communicate with the dead. Although his parents have made it clear to him there are no such things as ghosts, Butters is sure one is haunting him. Butters knows he has to give up his ghost pal or be put into a mental institution.
Erection Day
All the kids are getting ready for the big South Park Elementary Talent Show and Jimmy can't wait to perform his new comedy routine. But lately, just like generations of little boys before him, Jimmy's noticed that one of his body parts has a mind of its own. Knowing he can't get up in front of the entire school in an excited state, Jimmy must find a way to gain control of his raging hormones.
Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow
A Global Warming State of Emergency is declared in South Park. The world's largest beaver dam breaks and floods the adjacent town of Beaverton. As the victims wait for help to arrive, everyone in South Park tackles priority number one: who is to blame? Only Stan and Cartman know who's really at fault.
Marjorine
The 4th grade girls are having a sleepover. It's imperative that the boys find out what goes on behind those closed doors. Butters is picked to be the boy who must fake his death, become a girl and infiltrate this age-old feminine tradition.
Follow That Egg
Mrs. Garrison realizes he still has feelings for Mr. Slave. But, Mr. Slave has moved on. He plans to marry his new love as soon as the Governor signs the same-sex marriage bill. Mrs. Garrison leads the charge against gay marriage.
Ginger Kids
Cartman suffers from a mysterious and sudden on-set of the disease Gingervitus. Sick and tired of being ripped-on because he now has red hair, light skin and freckles, he rallies all ginger kids to fight against discrimination.
Trapped in the Closet
Stan is identified as the reincarnation of L. Ron Hubbard and Scientologists converge on his front lawn asking him to lead them. A prominent Hollywood actor also shows up looking for Stan's approval. When Stan criticizes his work, the A-lister locks himself in the closet and refuses to come out.
Free Willzyx
A "talking" whale inspires the fourth-graders to risk everything to return him to his family. With the police on their tails, the boys enlist the help of a foreign government and embark upon an adventure you'll not soon forget. One in which the boys learn just how far you would go for a friend.
Bloody Mary
Stan is embarrassed in front of his friends when his dad gets pulled over for drunk driving. In a neighboring town, a bleeding statue of Mary is discovered and the faithful are flocking to the site hoping to be healed. Stan's dad is sure the bleeding Virgin can cure him of his "disease."
The Return of Chef
The town is jolted out of a case of the doldrums when Chef suddenly reappears. While Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman are thrilled to have their old friend back, they notice that something about the chef seems different. When Chef's strange behavior starts getting him in trouble, the boys pull out all the stops to save him.
Smug Alert!
Stan persuades all the citizens of South Park to buy hybrid cars. A disaster of epic proportions threatens the town and Stan is to blame -- just as everyone starts to feel really good about what they're doing to help save the earth, scientists discover a stormy, dark mass accumulating over the town.
A Million Little Fibers
Towelie gets over his drug addiction and writes a moving book about his experiences. Thanks to Oprah’s support, the book became a best seller and his story inspires millions to turn their lives around. However, when he’s caught in a lie by the grand dame of daytime television, Towelie’s old habits start to look mighty appealing.
Manbearpig
The boys are trapped in a cave and Cartman finds treasure.
Tsst
When Cartman's mom realizes she can't control her son anymore, she gets help from an expert. The "Dog Whisperer" may have what it takes but Eric Cartman's not going down without a fight.
Make Love, Not Warcraft
There's trouble in the online gaming world when a mad gamer won't play by the rules. The boys dedicate their lives to defeating the renegade and saving the World of Warcraft.
Mystery of the Urinal Deuce
The world’s biggest conspiracy of all time will finally be uncovered when Eric Cartman exposes the true culprit behind the September 11th attacks. No one in South Park is safe from the people who are the real brains behind the 9/11 conspiracy. When Kyle and Stan hit the road in search of the truth, they come face-to-face with the masterminds.
Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy
Cartman is appointed to the post of School Hallway Monitor at South Park Elementary. In his new role, Cartman takes it personally when an infraction is committed in his jurisdiction. When Kyle discovers that a teacher is having sex with a student, he and Cartman have to team up to put a stop to the inappropriate behavior.
Hell on Earth 2006
Satan is throwing the biggest Halloween costume party ever, and no one will be admitted without a wristband. Satan is busy checking the R.S.V.P. list and deciding what costume to wear to the big event. Every detail must be perfect for the prince of darkness, but even Satan can’t foresee everything.
Go God Go
Cartman's plan to propel himself into the future goes horribly wrong. South Park Elementary faces strong opposition to the topic of evolution being taught to the 4th graders. Eric Cartman can't be bothered with what's going on in class. He's busy manipulating his own personal time-line to align with the precise release date of the newest, hottest game.
Go God Go XII
In the previous episode, Eric Cartman froze himself in an attempt to make his three-week wait for a Nintendo Wii pass quickly. A freak accident landed him over 500 years in the future -- and now he's stuck there. The future is a tumultuous place with warring factions, angry sea otters and no Nintendo. Will Cartman find a way back to his own time?
Stanley's Cup
Stan Marsh has hit rock bottom. He's got no job, no bicycle and his only way out of a bad situation is to coach the local pee wee hockey team. Once a hotshot pee wee hockey player himself, Stan Marsh has tried to put those days behind him. But he's still living with the memory of how he let his team down when he missed the winning shot in the big game.
With Apologies to Jesse Jackson
After Randy Marsh experiences an unfortunate incident on national TV, the "N" bomb hits South Park. While Randy seeks forgiveness from Jesse Jackson, South Park Elementary invites a midget by the name of Dr. Nelson to talk about sensitivity.
Cartman Sucks
When his "ultimate plan" to embarrass Butters backfires, Cartman struggles to keep his classmates from seeing a compromising photograph. Meanwhile, Butters is sent to a special camp where they "Pray the Gay Away."
Lice Capades
An infestation of head lice plagues South Park Elementary. When Mr. Garrison refuses to name names, Cartman finds a way to detect who has lice in the hopes of making fun of his unfortunate classmate.
The Snuke
While Cartman follows a lead on a possible terrorist attack, Hillary Clinton makes a campaign stop in South Park for a big rally.
Fantastic Easter Special
Determined to get the real story behind why he has to decorate eggs for Easter, Stan falls in with an eccentric society that guards a legendary secret.
D-Yikes!
Ms. Garrison gets dumped again and takes her frustration out on the fourth grade class. However, things start looking up for her when she meets a new friend at the gym and they go out for drink at a local "girl bar."
Night of the Living Homeless
As an increasing number of homeless people are begging for change all over South Park, the boys work to solve the homeless problem once and for all.
Le Petit Tourette
Cartman discovers the joys of having Tourette’s syndrome. Drunk with the power of saying whatever he wants without getting in trouble for it, he lines up national TV coverage to take advantage of his new life with no filters.
More Crap
Stan’s dad becomes South Park’s home-town hero when the guys down at the local bar see the size of his most recent crap.
Imaginationland
When the entire contents of the world’s imagination lay open before them, Stan and Kyle step right in. Back in South Park, Cartman swears he’s seen a leprechaun.
Imaginationland Episode II
Stan and Kyle are being held in the bowels of the Pentagon until they tell the government how they got into Imaginationland. Meanwhile, Cartman simply won’t rest until he finds Kyle and gets him to make good on their bet to suck his balls.
Imaginationland Episode III
Inside Imaginationland, Stan and Butters engage in the battle of their lives as they fight the army of evil imaginary forces. Meanwhile, Cartman goes all the way to the Supreme Court to get Kyle to pay up on their bet.
Guitar Queer-O
Stan and Kyle are hooked on Guitar Hero. Unfortunately, Stan’s superior skills on the video game damage his friendship with Kyle.
The List
The girls in the fourth grade class have made a secret list that rates every boy’s looks from cutest to ugliest. When the boys steal the list, they are completely unprepared to deal with the results.
Tonsil Trouble
Cartman finds himself fighting for his life after a routine tonsillectomy goes horribly wrong. When Kyle becomes infected with Cartman's ailment, the two won't stop for anything as they search for a cure that will reverse their otherwise certain mortality.
Britney's New Look
When the boys help Britney Spears get to the North Pole, they discover the shocking secret behind her popularity.
Major Boobage
In a South Park homage to the 1981 film, "Heavy Metal," the boys are trying to get Kenny off the latest drug craze that's captured the junior high and under set.
Canada On Strike
The head of the World Canadian Bureau leads the country into a long and painful strike and the responsibility of brokering a settlement rests with the boys.
Eek, A Penis!
While Ms. Garrison is off trying to find a way to become the man he always intended to be, Cartman is put in charge of the classroom.
Over Logging
The citizens of South Park wake up and find the internet is gone. When Randy hears there may still be some internet out in California, he packs up his family and heads west.
Super Fun Time
While the kids are on an educational field trip to a living museum, Cartman makes Butters sneak away from the class to go to the amusement center located next door.
The China Probrem
With the rest of the American people haunted by the memory of a recent tragic event, only Butters will stand with Cartman as he confronts the Chinese.
Breast Cancer Show Ever
Wendy gets in trouble when she threatens to beat up Cartman after school.
Pandemic
While the world struggles to contain an epidemic of epic proportions, the boys find a way to make money off of it.
Pandemic 2 -- The Startling
Giant guinea pigs are attacking cities all over the world. The boys have the key that will save everyone from the onslaught but they're stranded in the Andes Mountains.
About Last Night ...
While the country celebrates the outcome of the election, the new President-elect catches everyone off guard when he arrives at the White House prematurely.
Elementary School Musical
The boys must embrace the latest fad to hit South Park Elementary or risk their status as the coolest kids in school.
The Ungroundable
Butters is sure he's seen a Vampire at school but he can't get anyone to listen to him. Meanwhile, the Goth Kids are angry and frustrated when the other kids can't tell the difference between a Goth and a Vampire.
The Ring
Kenny takes his new girlfriend to a Jonas Brothers' concert where they each get purity rings.
The Coon
"The Coon" rises from the trash and takes his place as a lone vigilante who wipes out crime in the town of South Park.
Margaritaville
Randy steps forward with a solution to fix the desperate state of the economy.
Eat, Pray, Queef
Someone plays an April Fool's joke on the boys and it doesn't go over well.
Fishsticks
Cartman and Jimmy come up with the funniest joke of all time.
Pinewood Derby
Randy has a plan that will assure Stan a first place trophy in this year's Pinewood Derby.
Fatbeard
Cartman's dream of living the life of a pirate will come true if he can just get to Somalia.
Dead Celebrities
Ike is being tormented by paranormal forces. Kyle brings in professional ghost hunters to help save his little brother.
Butters' Bottom Bitch
Butters is determined to get his first kiss so his friends won’t make fun of him anymore.
W.T.F.
After attending their first WWE match, all the boys want to be professional wrestlers.
Whale Whores
Stan takes action to stop the Japanese from killing the world's whales and dolphins.
The F Word
The boys fight back against the loud and obnoxious Motorcycle Riders that are disrupting everyone in South Park.
Dances with Smurfs
Cartman is chosen to do the morning announcements at South Park Elementary.
Pee
The boys' fun-filled day at the water park is about to turn deadly.
Sexual Healing
The latest in scientific testing reveals that some of the boys at South Park Elementary have a sex addiction problem.
The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs
The boys are given a controversial book to read in school and it inspires them to write one of their own.
Medicinal Fried Chicken
Cartman's favorite restaurant has been shut down and replaced by a store that sells medicinal marijuana. Randy is desperate to get a prescription card to buy pot and Cartman will do anything to get his beloved fried chicken back.
You Have 0 Friends
When Kyle begs Stan to "friend" him, Stan gets sucked into Facebook.
Crippled Summer
Jimmy and Timmy are off to summer camp with all their handicapable friends.
Poor and Stupid
Cartman dreams of being a NASCAR driver and he's willing to do whatever it takes to make it happen.
It's a Jersey Thing
New Jersey is taking over the nation one state at a time. Randy and the boys take a stand as the Jerseyites approach South Park.
Insheeption
When Stan is sent to the school counselor because he's holding on to an obscene number of useless possessions, he realizes that Mr. Mackey has a hoarding disorder too.
Coon 2: Hindsight
"Coon and Friends" set out to help the victims of BP's latest catastrophic drilling accident in the Gulf. Much to the Coon's dismay, another Super Hero gets there first.
Mysterion Rises
Mysterion's true identity is revealed. Meanwhile, the Coon, scorned by his fellow Super Heroes, is out for revenge.
Coon vs. Coon & Friends
Coon and Friends find themselves at the mercy of Cartman who now has the dark lord, Cthulhu, doing his bidding. Kenny wrestles with the curse of his super power through his alter ego, Mysterion.
Creme Fraiche
Randy's obsession with the Food Network forces Sharon to explore a new interest of her own.
HumancentiPad
Kyle is intimately involved in the development of a revolutionary new product called HumancentiPad.
Funnybot
Jimmy hosts the Special Ed Department’s First Annual Comedy Awards.
Royal Pudding
The Prince of Canada is about to take a Princess and Ike is obsessed with the Royal Wedding.
T.M.I.
Cartman throws a fit when the boys' penis sizes are posted on the school bulletin board, and is sent to anger management therapy.
Crack Baby Athletic Association
Kyle gets in on the ground floor of Cartman’s latest business venture, The Crack Baby Athletic Association.
City Sushi
Butters is diagnosed with multiple personality disorder.
You're Getting Old
Just after Stan’s 10th birthday, his worldview starts to change and so do his friendships.
Ass Burgers
Cartman finds a unique way to cope with Asperger's Syndrome.
The Last of the Meheecans
What begins as an innocent game between the boys turns serious when Cartman joins the U.S. Border Patrol. Not surprisingly, Cartman turns out to be really good at stopping Mexicans.
Bass to Mouth
The students of South Park Elementary are the victims of a new gossip website. An elusive hacker has somehow gained access into the student’s confidential phone calls and e-mails and is posting all their juicy stories. The boys are shocked when they discover the identity of the hacker.
Broadway Bro Down
Sharon is thrilled that Randy is making an effort to do more things that she enjoys. But after he takes her to see a hit musical in Denver, Randy becomes Broadway’s biggest fan. Sharon is whisked away to New York and treated to every musical on the Great White Way.
1%
The kids at South Park Elementary are being punished for Cartman's failings in the physical education department. What will Cartman do when they all gang up on him?
A History Channel Thanksgiving
After watching a Thanksgiving special on The History Channel, the boys believe that aliens were involved in the original feast. But, questions remain… was the first Thanksgiving Dinner haunted? Is alien technology responsible for stuffing? The truth could change Thanksgiving everyone.
The Poor Kid
With their parents in jail, Kenny and his brother and sister find themselves in the foster care system. Cartman is sincerely disturbed when Kenny is taken away. He doesn't know who to rip on for being the poorest kid in school anymore.
Reverse Cowgirl
One of the boys had been told time and time again about leaving the toilet seat up after he goes to the bathroom, but he didn’t listen. His actions have consequences and ultimately result in an unimaginable catastrophe.
Cash For Gold
Cartman launches a gemstones network show and creates a very lucrative business. Stan searches for the real value of a piece of jewelry that was a gift from his Grandpa. Meanwhile, Cartman’s lucrative new business preys upon an extremely vulnerable clientele.
Faith Hilling
Mankind’s evolution begins to accelerate at a rapid and disturbing pace. Concurrently, another species on the planet is exhibiting the same drastic development. Eventually the two species will battle to the death and "Faith Hilling" may be humanity’s only hope.
Jewpacabra
South Park’s big Easter egg hunt is in jeopardy when there are rumors of a dangerous beast lurking in the woods nearby. Cartman tries to warn everyone that their lives are at risk if they participate in the egg hunt. No one believes him until he produces video evidence of the mysterious being.
Butterballs
Stan wants to raise awareness about the dangers of bullying by shooting a big dance video. Will he be able to handle the pressure that goes along with the notoriety of taking on such a worthy cause?
I Should Have Never Gone Ziplining
The boys are excited to spend a day ziplining in the Colorado Mountains. But high in the Rockys, far from their families, their trip takes a bad turn. Chances of survival are slim. All they can do is wait to be rescued. But will help come too late?
Cartman Finds Love
There's a new girl in school and everyone wants to know who she has a crush on. Cartman is especially excited. He's discovered something inside himself that he never knew he had. Now, to make sure nobody gets in the way of true love, it's time for Cartman to finally let someone know exactly how he feels.
Sarcastaball
As a concerned parent, Randy radically changes the way football is played at South Park Elementary. The new version of the game quickly becomes the nation’s most popular sport. One gifted student emerges as a star athlete in Sarcastaball.
Raising The Bar
Cartman owns up to being fat and decides that driving around on a scooter is his right. Kyle sees that Cartman isn’t the only one who finds no shame in his unhealthy lifestyle. Meanwhile, Cartman discovers he has a rival in America’s Sweetheart, Honey Boo Boo.
Insecurity
The man who visits all the homes in South Park every day is now under suspicion. The luxury of having packages delivered to your doorstep is suddenly a threat to every family in the neighborhood. Cartman takes matters into his own hands and signs up for a home security system.
Going Native
When Butters starts acting out at school, his parents realize it’s time to tell him why he’s not like all of the other kids. He must travel to a foreign place to learn the ways of his people. It will be a difficult trip for a young boy to make alone so Butters chooses Kenny to travel with him to the distant and secluded island of Hawaii.
A Nightmare On FaceTime
The boys are all ready to dress up as their favorite foursome, the Avengers, for Halloween. After months of planning their costumes, at the last minute Randy tells Stan he can’t go trick or treating with his friends. Instead, Stan has to pitch in and help his father with a new business venture.
A Scause For Applause
Rocked by the recent news of drug use by a beloved icon, the world is left feeling lost and betrayed. The boys, join with the rest of the nation, and remove their yellow wristbands. Everyone is on board, except for Stan, who just can't seem to cut off his bracelet.
Obama Wins!
Cartman is hiding something in his bedroom that could change the outcome of the entire election. While Americans innocently plan to go to sleep Tuesday night with the election results counted and a winner announced, Cartman has secretly wrestled control of the Presidential election from the voters.
Let Go, Let Gov
When Cartman manages to get himself behind the doors of the NSA, he doesn't like what he finds in his personal file. He thinks it's time he told everyone the truth. Meanwhile, Butters finds someone new to listen to his prayers.
Informative Murder Porn
The kids are trying to keep their parents from watching graphic sex and violence on television. Now Randy and Sharon's nightly TV routine is interrupted and getting their "Informative Murder Porn" back is a matter of life and death.
World War Zimmerman
Cartman is deeply disturbed by a single person who he sees as a threat to all humanity. He races around the country to put an end to patient zero, the ticking time bomb that is Token.
Goth Kids 3: Dawn of the Posers
One of the Goth kids has been sent to a camp for troubled children. When she returns, her friends find her changed in a disturbing way. With their very existence threatened, the Goths have to do something drastic. They are forced to ask the Vamp kids for help.
Taming Strange
Ike just isn't himself lately and he and Kyle are growing apart. Kyle goes to the guidance counselor for advice but Mr. Mackey is too busy dealing with the bugs in the school's new integrated technology system to help. Kyle decides to take Ike to a live performance of his favorite show: Yo Gabba Gabba. He hopes it'll make his little brother like him again.
Ginger Cow
Religious leaders descend upon South Park to witness a Biblical prophecy that has been fulfilled. Cartman and Kyle are the only two at odds as the world embarks upon a thousand years of peace and harmony.
Black Friday
The dark days of winter are coming and that can only mean one thing: the fight to be the first in the mall on Black Friday has begun. The boys prepare to battle the crowds the day after Thanksgiving to get the best deal on the new gaming systems. Meanwhile Randy gets a job working as a mall security guard to help control the insane number of people lining up to take advantage of the official first day of holiday shopping.
A Song of Ass and Fire
The console wars are heating up in South Park. Princess Kenny's betrayal has left Cartman out for revenge. The kids prepare for an epic battle where one faction's favorite gaming device will come out on top. Will Stan and Kyle's friendship survive Black Friday?
Titties and Dragons
Princess Kenny's charm has brought more and more support to the Playstation camp. Cartman and Kyle have not wavered in their loyalty to Xbox. But now, the wait is over. It's time for everyone who has lined up to seize their opportunity for Black Friday sales. It's going to be a bloodbath and only one side will be left standing.
The Hobbit
Wendy tries to prove a point about how much pressure little girls feel to look like celebrities. Her latest soapbox issue gets her in trouble with everyone at school. It also gets Clyde a new girlfriend.
Go Fund Yourself
After Cartman and the boys name their new company, The Washington Redskins, they just sit back and watch the funding roll in. The head coach of the Washington Redskins football team demands that they change the name but Cartman digs in his heels. The Washington Redskins may never mean the same thing ever again.
Gluten Free Ebola
Mr. Mackey is now gluten free and everyone is annoyed when he won't quit preaching about how great he feels. But, after witnessing a disturbing demonstration of what happens to your body when you do eat gluten, South Park becomes the first town in America to go gluten free.
The Cissy
Stan is searching for answers about how a person who he's always known to be one thing could suddenly identify with another. In the meantime, the pressure of holding on to a giant secret is starting to get to Randy.
Handicar
Timmy's idea to raise money for the summer camp has everyone in South Park trying out the latest trend in transportation. Timmy's success makes him a lot of enemies and a bloodbath of epic proportions is on the horizon.
The Magic Bush
Cartman and Butters get their hands on a drone and take it for a spin around the neighborhood.
Freemium Isn't Free
Stan is addicted to the latest app to hit the market. Meanwhile, Terrance and Philip aren't feeling so good about the fortune they're making on their new mobile game.
Grounded Vindaloop
Butters is convinced that he's living in a virtual reality. When he suddenly goes rogue and wreaks havoc at home and all over South Park, everyone struggles to figure out what's real.
Cock Magic
Kenny excels at playing the game, Magic: The Gathering. He has the boys' full attention until a new, hard-core activity gets in the way. When Wendy tries to get Stan to pay attention to what she's doing, she realizes that what he does with his guy friends always comes first.
#REHASH
Kyle can't figure out why Ike and his friends want to watch people comment on things going on around them rather than experience it for themselves. Meanwhile, the Marsh family needs money after Stan spent it all on freemium games, so Randy is forced to perform live to bring in some cash.
#HappyHolograms
Still burning over Ike calling him a Grandpa, Kyle teams up with some heavy hitters in the entertainment industry to create the most extravagant televised Holiday Spectacular ever. He's sure that this event will be just the thing to bring families together again. Meanwhile, multiple holograms are still on the loose in South Park.
Stunning and Brave
There is a new principal at the helm of South Park Elementary. He forces the boys to confront the damage they’ve done through their history of racism and unconscious bias.
Where My Country Gone?
The boys are at odds with the increasing number of undocumented immigrants in their classroom. Mr Garrison wants to build a wall to keep them all out.
The City Part of Town
As the town is gentrifying around him, Kenny attempts to climb out of the cycle of poverty by taking a job at City Wok.
You're Not Yelping
There's a new kid in school and his parents have opened a restaurant in the recently gentrified part of town. Cartman now considers himself the top online restaurant reviewer in South Park.
Safe Space
Randy has to deal with uncomfortable confrontations every time he shops at the new Whole Foods. He feels exposed at every turn and it's ruining his Whole Foods experience. Randy and Cartman are both seeking a safe space.
Tweek x Craig
The news of a romantic relationship between Tweek and Craig hits South Park Elementary. Mr. Mackey tries to figure out who started the rumor. Meanwhile, Cartman, who struggles to understand his friends' relationship, finds he has an admirer of his own.
Naughty Ninjas
The evermore PC citizens of South Park decide that they no longer need a police force. As the first American town to get rid of their cops, they plan to celebrate their advanced sensibilities with a PC Carnival.
Sponsored Content
Jimmy is sent to the principal's office for using an inappropriate word in the school paper. His integrity as a newsman runs head-on into PC Principals ideology. Will Jimmy be the undoing of PC Principal?
Truth and Advertising
Being the crack reporter that he is, Jimmy sets out to learn everything he can about what makes Leslie tick. Meanwhile, Principal Victoria and Mr. Garrison return to a South Park that has become unrecognizable.
PC Principal Final Justice
The gentrification of South Park is pricing Randy right out of town. Meanwhile, Kyle’s distrust of Stan has broken their friendship and thrown Kyle into a dangerous alliance.
Member Berries
In the season 20 premiere episode, the National Anthem gets a reboot by an American Icon.
Skank Hunt
Kyle's dad manages to keep his identity as a troll secret while he takes his online abuse global.
The Damned
Gerald enjoys more media attention as SkankHunt42 continues to troll everyone and anyone. Meanwhile, Garrison is getting ready for the Presidential debate.
Wieners Out
Kyle feels tremendous guilt over the rift between the boys and the girls. When he tries to bring them together, things only get worse. The boys finally band together to stand up for their rights.
Douche and a Danish
The kids get pulled in to the search for the notorious Skankhunt42. Meanwhile, Gerald joins forces with the other trolls to stop Denmark from launching TROLLTRACE.COM.
Fort Collins
Everyone freaks out when an entire city in Colorado gets hacked. Gerald faces ruin if his complete history of internet activity becomes public. Memberberries are afraid for their lives, and Cartman starts to realize the future is in jeopardy.
Oh, Jeez
PC Principal tries one more time to make peace between the boys and the girls. Meanwhile, Gerald comes face-to-face with the Troll Hunter.
Members Only
Gerald tries anything to escape the Troll Hunter's revenge. Meanwhile, Cartman and Heidi make their way to SpaceX to try to get on the first rocket leaving for Mars.
Not Funny
Cartman is certain Heidi can solve the problem of getting them to Mars because she's really funny. Gerald tries to save himself by reasoning with the Troll Hunter while Garrison explores his new found military power.
The End of Serialization As We Know It
As TROLLTRACE goes live, Sheila logs on to see Gerald's on-line activity. At SpaceX, Cartman tries to convince the scientists that going to Mars is a bad idea. And defying their mom, Kyle and Ike get all the kids together to try to save the world from certain destruction.
White People Renovating Houses
Protestors armed with tiki torches and confederate flags take to the streets of South Park. Randy comes to grips with what it means to be white in today's society.
Put It Down
When Tweek is caught in the middle of a petty conflict, it drives his relationship with Craig to the brink.
Holiday Special
In a return to form, a forbidden love story between a white man and a Native American man unfolds. However, the boys' story exploits people's misery for laughs. 4-1/2 out of 5 stars. A-
Franchise Prequel
Professor Chaos has found the perfect tool to spread lies and misinformation about Coon and Friends. In trying to save their reputation, the boys come face-to-face with Mark Zuckerberg.
Hummels & Heroin
Drugs are flowing into South Park. A passionate young health advocate has traced the source of these illegal meds and is about to expose Stan Marsh.
Sons a Witches
This year at the traditional Halloween get-together, a witch casts a spell that terrorizes the town and ruins Halloween for the boys. Cartman sees a way to use the witch's power to his advantage.
Doubling Down
Kyle doesn't understand why Heidi won’t break up with Cartman. He's playing with fire when he gets in the middle of the school's most talked-about couple.
Moss Piglets
Jimmy and Timmy's project has caught the attention of some very important people. Their experiment could have far-reaching implications that could save the world ... and they might even win first prize in this year's science fair.
SUPER HARD PCness
PC Principal is wrestling with some unfamiliar feelings. Meanwhile, boys will be boys except for Kyle who, for the first time, seems to see things differently from the rest of his friends.
Splatty Tomato
The children of South Park claim to have seen Mr. Garrison lurking around town and they're frightened. The town comes together to make the President go away.
Dead Kids
Randy is desperate to help Sharon get her emotions under control and Cartman unexpectedly fails his math test.
A Boy and a Priest
A very special relationship has developed between Butters and the Parish Priest. When the town finds the church doors locked and no sign of the pair, they call in the Catholic Church.
The Problem with a Poo
Mr. Hankey’s offensive behavior puts him in jeopardy of being fired as the Director of the Annual Christmas Pageant. Meanwhile, at South Park Elementary, Strong Woman and PC Principal face a whole new set of challenges in their relationship.
Tegridy Farms
Butters is selling vape pens and all kinds of fruity-flavored vape accessories at school. Meanwhile, Randy decides he should move the family to the country and take up farming.
The Scoots
This year, a revolution in mobility is changing Halloween for everyone. Chaos erupts as every kid is out to get more candy than they have ever gotten before. Mr. Mackey and the rest of the adults are hoarding emergency supplies and hoping to survive until morning.
Time to Get Cereal
When dead citizens start popping up all over town, the boys realize they need Al Gore’s help. The boys are willing to do almost anything to save the town, and themselves, but it may be too late.
Nobody Got Cereal?
The boys break out of jail and are on the run from the police and ManBearPig. Satan steps up to help the boys and the rest of the citizens of South Park.
Buddha Box
Cartman just can't deal with people any longer. They get in the way of what's most important in his life.
Unfulfilled
The citizens of South Park are enjoying all the perks of being a company town when the Amazon Fulfillment Center moves in. Everything is just swell until the contradictions inherent in capitalism threaten to bring down the entire system.
Bike Parade
Despite the chaos at the Amazon Fulfillment Center, the Bike Parade is still on. The boys’ chance of winning is in jeopardy when Kenny resists commercialism in solidarity with the striking workers.
Mexican Joker
In the pilot episode of the new hit series, Tegridy Farms, Randy battles home-grown weed and comes to terms with the fact that he might be a towel. Meanwhile, Kyle goes to camp.
Band in China
Randy lands in big trouble on a visit to China. Meanwhile, Stan starts a band to work out his frustration over having to move away from South Park.
SHOTS!!!
This week, Randy revels in a Tegridy Farms milestone. Meanwhile, Cartman stands his ground and refuses to get a shot.
Let Them Eat Goo
The citizens of South Park are moving toward a completely plant-based diet. Cartman is pretty sure the new food in the cafeteria gave him a heart attack.
Tegridy Farms Halloween Special
It's Halloween and Randy is dealing with his daughter's marijuana problem. Butters gets an unexpected surprise when he visits the Egyptian Artifact exhibit at the Denver Museum.
Season Finale
The Mayor has evidence that Randy blew up his neighbor's yards in protest over homegrown weed and then blamed it on a Mexican Joker. Now the citizens of South Park have had enough of Randy and Tegridy Farms and they just want to lock him up.
Board Girls
In the season opener, an even stronger woman causes big problems for PC Principal. Cartman, Stan and the rest of the boys meet their match when some of the girls join their board gamers club.
Turd Burglars
Kyle's mom looks so good after her fecal transplant that everyone wants to get their hands on her goods. Cartman and the boys jump into the quest for the best microbiome.
Basic Cable
Scott Malkinson's future with the new girl in his class depends on him getting the latest and greatest streaming platform. Scott's dad works for the local cable company and refuses to move beyond basic cable.
Christmas Snow
It's a bleak Christmas Season in South Park this year and it's all Santa's fault. He is single handedly stealing the joy from the holiday. The town just wants their Christmas Spirit back but that will take a Christmas miracle.
Pajama Day
After failing to show respect for their teacher, PC Principal revokes Pajama Day privileges for the entire 4th grade class. Cartman is distraught. The kids aren't going to stand for it but PC Principal refuses to back down.
The Big Fix
Stan's horrified to realize he's misinterpreted some of the greatest writing of all time.
City People
Cartman is furious with his mom when she tells him about her new job.
Back to the Cold War
A lot is riding on Butter's ability to crush the competition in the all-important dressage championship.
Help, My Teenager Hates Me
The boys find out that the joys of playing Airsoft come with the challenges of dealing with teenagers.
Credigree Weed St. Patrick's Day Special
Butters is shocked to learn that people in South Park don't understand what St. Patrick's Day is really about.